There are a lot of things Bruce Springsteen does well.
Playing three-hour concerts.
Reminding us that there’s a lot of hard-working people out there doing it tough.
But from what we can gather from his latest short film/video ‘Hunter Of Invisible Game’, Bruce Springsteen is not equipped for the apocalypse.
The film follows The Boss as he roams through the wilderness and dilapidated buildings in theaftermath of some horrible disaster that’s wiped out civilisation and left Earth looking like a giant Rivers commercial.
From the outset, it’s clear he doesn’t quite have his priorities straight. Rather than collecting food or water, The Boss has instead opted to salvageas many vintage items as possible, hoping that once civilisation makes a comeback, he can resurrect Urban Outfitters.
Bruce remembers images of his late family, and tries to forget the gruesomeness of when he was forced to eat the entire E Street Band.
Despite his emotional torment, he battles on, and survives heart-racing confrontations with deadly piles of sticks.
And whatever it was that just made that sound in the dark.
We all know that surviving the great stick/night invasion of 2016 led to a vast shortage of bath time, so when our hero finally comes across a stream and gets to clean-up, there’s only time for shirts off, Levis on.
MISTAKE!
For anyone with even basic survival skills, they know that 90% of post-apocalypse deaths are caused by getting denim wet. Chafe is almost always terminal, even for 64-year-old rock gods with washboard abs. He succumbs to the damp, but is eventually rescued by one of his younger fans.
The boy takes Bruce back to meet with his people, who like anyone that gets to meet their favourite rockstar, celebrate the occasion by ordering a round of shots and forcing him to drink. Bruce, always a man of the people, obliges their hospitality.
It’s here we see The Boss make yet another fatal mistake, deciding rather than party on with his new found group of bros, he’d rather saddle up his faithful steed and suit up his $4,000 leather bomber jacket and take off solo, ignoring the old adage of safety in numbers. He throws the boy his cane, in a symbolic gesture of giving up.
Finally, he rides off into the sunset/certain death.
Watch the whole, sad tale over at Springsteen’s website,brucespringsteen.net
Or you can remember when Bruce Springsteen film clips were just him playing live and were totally awesome by watching ‘The River’ below:
Originally published on maxtv.com.au